Random thought

Frequency a baffling concept yet sensitivity to this minor concept could make a colossal difference to our lonely souls.

We all know it exists. Of the 100 people on your floor, its that single person who sends the most finely tuned frequency. I oft have noted that the poor souls at office who seem to get along with everyone are usually faking it and are the loneliest of the lot. Please refrain from mixing getting along to indulging in tp conversation with all, which I can be accused of doing.

1 of 100 is a great record if you ask me. The more accurate statistic would be 1(who does not work in office) of 1200 or 1300 whatever be the latest number(the entire office). A parallel yet converging theory to this is that we also possess different frequencies. To list a few:

• 91.1 - the womanly connect - sorry guys you will never get this one ;)
• 93.5 - the tp type - friendly banter, mostly harmless.
• 95 - professional - no choice, leadership, the experts and a few intelligent beings at work have to fall into this category
• 98.3 - the comical connect - yeah some people have the knack of making you laugh helplessly
• 102.5 - the intellectual connect - this is usually satisfied by googling unless you are in academics
• 106.4 - The friendly connect - Noticeably more than the 93.5 above -watch movies, go out maybe similar music taste, cry, laugh, genuine caring.
  
• 104 - the cribbing connect - this could happen with either of the above (pls note am talking about connect, strictly avoidable with people who don't)

Most of these interactions are mostly one to many and catching these generally get you by peacefully. The more the 106.4 the more fun will life be.

However, the colossal difference mentioned is to do with a frequency which is indescribable yet at some level we have all experienced it. Its when someone really sees you, right through the demeanor that you unconsciously or maybe consciously have acquired. We might find this with a few training professionals or behavior specialists who have met scores of people and somehow say just the right thing, so for explaining my theory lets discount them.

100.1 - have you tuned in? You don't really need to talk here, yet if no words you might never realize its existence. So you talk and are seldom misunderstood. No explanations and clarifications of intent needed, of thoughts maybe yes. Do you see that something around you glows in the presence of this frequency? Can I label it as spiritual? Would not like to, keeping in mind the word has become a fashion statement now-a-days. If either of the above frequencies say I love you babe or that you are a beautiful person the only thing they satisfy is your ego, but when 100.1 says it, it stirs you. Its a re enforcement that the beliefs you've lived by are not baseless. If you are lucky you might also race ahead on the path of self discovery.

Romeo and Juliet

In an Indian Context....Juliet is perfectly savvy...oh a good woman..good at her work..looks good!

Juliet meets Romeo, how is incidental and not important so they say. Romeo hears music..and says you and me babe how about it? Juliet says " Will do whatever my parents say.." - she is lying I tell you (read this as am not sure). tch tch..romeo you guys met for the first time man.

A lovestruck romeo....hangs in there and sure he realizes that its just that the time was wrong. Now is the interesting part. Juliet being an Indian woman needs to get married fast...so she had fallen for chains of silver but now Romeo was gold ( all this relative) she realized! So they continue...month after month passes...Juliet wanted romeo to call everyday...says he gotta show me he likes me right?...romeo didnt get the message...just kept surfing for more options. Man he gotta protect himself right ;)

Juliet had the hand of god play (or lets just say a password) in her life and realised what romeo was doing and kaput....romeo didn't know what hit him. Juliet says...Hey romeo you nearly gave me a heart attack...you shouldn't just preach but practice...have a nice life! Romeo called 17 times(!!!) says all I do is miss you and the way we used to be!

Juliet a woman after all came around...but heavier things now....Juliet was from a different world, she bought expensive clothes, never thought before spending..Romeo simple that he was did not. Juliet had no idea what satvik was...and romeo was almost a priest.

This drove Juliet to almost forget Romeo...till one day..romeo comes and says...babe we are getting married now..and Juliet says ok...(what? did I hear right?)..aah a staunch believer that love doesnt exist...juliet now is burning cds of love songs for romeo(!!!!)

Juliet loves sitting at coffee shops yakking with friends...but has warned all friends now that she will only have coffee with romeo from now on...juliet has also said she will not be disturbed for 2 months as she....no no...doesnt want to set up home etc...she wants to visit all Romeos relatives, she's bought all the sarees afterall. No work for Juliet now..at least temporarily. Juliet will also be veg forever, not drink, not eat onion and garlic and will lead a satvik life forever.

Juliet babe wish you luck...but be a woman to him and not a wife.

A holiday in Ladakh

It was a year ago, the need to do something different in my heart drove me to sign up with an adventure company to conquer the himalayas.

A year later with memories fresh in my mind, I write this blog as a tribute to ladakh. Truly a place which gave me no feel of being in India, except for the locals who spoke perfect hindi, yet looked like Tibetans.I met my holiday partners in Cp, Delhi while catching a bus to Manali. All of us city people had no clue what it would be like. The only education i had received was from this awesome old man who ran a shop in Dadar selling trekking gear. We spent two days in Manali, where we had a nice time visiting some hot water springs, walking to Hadimba temple and the night saw us in this pub which was quite quaint. Beware of Manali as my camera, phone and wallet got flicked the same night from my hotel room, while I was sleeping :(

The trip from Manali to Leh was something I would never forget...a mixture of lovely landscape, good conversation with strangers and altitude. We didnt realise while climbing except for a slight headache that we were actually being driven through 17000ft. The night we spent at Keylong where some holiday partners had a rather uninformed discussion about the gandhian philosophy...all heated...and fun. A special mention of Guru, James and Frank who made this a rather interesting drive
After a 2 day journey we finally reached this quaint little holiday hotspot called leh. Its amazing how so many people from all over the world visit Leh and Indians prefer to stop at Manali. The ratio people was 3:1 !!!!

Leh has a great feel about it. Lovely helpful locals, 5 german bakeries with yummy apple pie, lots of army walas and the shanti stupa. I would advise to go up there (read about 800ft..stairs made) in the evening and wait for the sun to go down. High up on the stupa with zillions of stars above you somehow is an exhilarating experience. We luckily bumped into James and Josh at night while strolling on the streets and trust Dj guru to have us all in splits.

After having discovered Leh, we started out for Nubra valley a day later where our guide had organised our trek. The famed Kharadungla pass was quite an experience with lots of people stopping to touch the snow..trust me you could stop just any where and pass the crowded pass. Strangers throwing snow balls at each other...the good thing is I discovered I am not a very snow person.
But, the sight of the clouds kissing the white mountains and road is pretty, very pretty. After camping for another two days at 13000-ft we started out for the pass at 18000ft that we were supposed to capture. Aah..that is an experience I would love to hate, but somehow cannot get the memory out of my mind. Every day we walked for 12km uphill for about 6-7 hrs. The first day was a rocky terrain beside a river, the next was on the wall of a gorge where if we had plummeted no one would have known. Day 3 was through villages and finally here I was hit by altitude. Our camp guide had to come back to where I rested for couple of hours and slowly we made our way to the camp site. All I can say dunno what hit me. The sight of the camp was most welcome and Rahul the cook made some great adrak chai which did wonders for my cold soul. This was 14000ft with cold winds blowing just all over.
The tents here are cooking tents and the horse mans tent. God save him...the guy comes to India from June - Aug and then sneaks through the china border right through the Himalayan ranges.

All rested (not really...as I just didnt get sleep up there in the cold), next morning we set out for the final base camp. The terrain was dry, rocky and there was no way. With the guides way ahead and the camp partners way behind, I wondered why did I have a guide anyways. However was an enchanting experience, as the sights along the way were really breathtaking.
We reached the base camp at 2.00pm, through thin air, the scorching UV rays of the sun beat down upon us mercilessly. Little did we know that at night we'd see temperatures going below zero. The next day we got up to see the stream beside our camp frozen!!!!
The final day walk was something I could never erase from my memory...again rockier terrain to begin with but to get through the pass we had to cross a kilometer of snow and ice...as seen on the pic. We reached the ice after a 4 hr walk at 18000ft and my first step on ice saw me slip and bruise my hands badly. Rauf the local guide literally had to pull me through for around 500mts. Seeing the top of the pass after that I got some mental strength in me and I eased my way up. My learning from this experience is that to give up or fail, you first have to do in the mind. And if you dont...there is a strong possibility that you might not fail. Reaching the top of the pass was more relieving then any feeling of accomplishment for me. However in retrospect feels great!

Another 5 hrs walk down to the base was easy and beautiful. With guru and me cribbing about our non helpful camp partners. He also got some villagers to give us some local fermented stuff which definitely gave us a boost and we ran down the rest of the mountain...lost our way and had to walk back to where the vehicle was waiting to take us back to leh (!!!!!) Our trek ended in some bad blood, where we engaged in a great fight which I do regret now, but something about that altitude people which makes you a little wonky.

The next day, coffee and apple pie at the german bakery in leh was to die for. We actually went into a cyber cafe and kissed the desktop (tch...tch...city virus). Our trip from Leh to Srinagar via Kargil was another eyeopener. The the grand Indian army and signs like " You are under enemy observation " or " Stay in the vehicle or you will get shot " (not really ;) but something similar) all over the place. The only mention of Srinagar that I can make maybe is about my amazement of how a whole city can be built on a lake. Srinagar was a disappointment after the truly majestic sights of Ladakh, but we did manage to see a kashmiri wedding and the shankaracharya and hazaratbal .....though nothing spectacular here.
The pic here is of the shikara ride we took to hazaratbal on the dal lake. We even managed to buy some souvenirs from the dal lake floating market and where I also discovered that there is a honey made by harvesting bees on poppy..which drugs you (!!!!) I got nicely ticked off by the dj to have kept this vital piece of information from him we came back to our houseboat honeyless :))). Srinagar, a city of past glory, truly has been dragged to its feet by the terrorism it has witnessed.
Gives you a helplessly sad feeling


Finally a tribute to the guys without whom we would not have accomplished anything...karma the horseman and his horses. God bless them!

I do recommend anyone with the love for the beauty of nature and the spirit of adventure to go to Ladakh and trek. Will I do it again?...lets just say I would love to walk up the beautiful well built mountain roads in Italy!!!!




A tribute to the spectacular beauty of the Himalayas. Am sure its effected me in a way I will only realize in the years to come.

*Pic credit - Guru, James and Prashant

Conspiracy theory

I first heard it in the alchemist. Magic thats what it bought into my life, I think it was 7 years ago, but no thats not where the story starts.

Some 12 years ago, just when I needed it a seagull called Johnathan flew in with perfection and I got it in an instant. No my dreams were not stupid. If it weren't for the seagull who refused to live only to catch fish and eat, I might have lived a life less fulfilling then what I did. Fly Fly high he said even if you might not make it, even if your wings are tired and everyone else around you says this is not what you should waste your time on. And it paid off didn't it. The point is even if it didn't, it was an awesome flight and it would be an awesome death.

The journey has been full of illusions, thoughts about parallel lifetimes and dreams about the bridge across forever.

However the questions and the cracks in the philosophy were plain to see, much as I tried to ignore it. It persisted. What was the missing link?

Santiago bought a revelation into my life. Was there something I was missing? His realization that he did have a dream, not really sure of what it was made him start out on a journey of experiences and discovery. The universe, he was told, conspires to make things happen, so just listen to the earth and feel the soul of the world and keep moving. Listen to the signs..... Indeed a magical journey of chance meetings and realizations. A patient journey of discovery, procrastination and a will to drift on. And on the way he found his dream. A cloud just knows he has to move in this direction, he may not know why...however the skies know and if you can rise above...so will you.

Why have I stopped? Its not as if you need to know your dream to journey on...do I really look for signs now? I have made enough to buy my two flocks of sheep...why am I still in the crystal shop? Am I becoming a part of the herd who catches fish to eat or who catches fish because thats what he has done and knows?...I don't think so yet.

A cry from the soul to the universe...conspire for my journey....conspire for my dream. The heart I know and listen to with utmost clarity...am waiting for the omens.

I think I cracked it...

This post is dedicated to all those lovely ladies trying to lose weight.

Well being an avid lover of the good things in life, which devilishly only make you wanna cry on the weighing scale...it took me some time to crack the code...thanks to some help from experts. Now experts I value for anything..design, analytics or health

First some general rules:

1) Know and love your body - Let me explain..I am an O+ve and carbs suit me...so I need not give up carbs at all. Proteins dont...so avoid proteins specially at night. Each of us have a unique body..know yours...go to the experts and ask. Find out what your body wants and listen to it.
2) Sorry girls, you have to balance the diet as well as exercise. Hey its not a bad thing you know...the high after an intense workout is quite awesome...just get a good and empathetic trainer.
3) Dance - Its absolutely a soul uplifting exercise...do it even if its alone at home or on your terrace. Try Shiamak if you want to really get the pleasure of dancing...I did.
4) If you live far from work...its worth paying that extra cash...even if its big money and move closer.
5) If you have never been 55 kgs in your life....its still possible...so get out of the myth and set some impossible goal.
6) Love walking...walk for hours if necessary...and no, walking 5 hrs a day at times doesnt kill you...if its boring...try trekking... or on sunday get a friend and walk those 20 kms to that far away museum or monument.
7) And hey heard about all those amazing spa's and massages....go ahead join. Trust me on this one.
8) Yoga - Girls its simple and easy and the best toner you can get...just watch that tummy go in...and watch your body become flexible.
9) Stretch - your body has an awesome capacity to stretch and its most effective.

Now the trick about keeping the darn thing off...

Some more specific rules

1) Lose more weight...change the exercise..play tennis, squash, swim or gym ( not a great fan of indoors...but gives you great results)
2) Did you just drink 4 margaritas? Well...i hope no fries (try roasted anything) along with it?...even if you did...next day..stay on fruits...or on only veggies...avoid carbs now...your body will not starve...and will get detoxified.
3) Your body has a threshold weight....if you have lost 5 kgs...you will definitely gain 3...so lose 8kgs. ( maybe the experts dont agree to this one)

Aah...did I hear you asking food...hmm...trust me one helping just finishes off that hunger...the rest is in your mind...so work on your mind. Satisfy it with what it needs...and its not food. Do you like writing...reading...find out what uplifts your mind...and do it.

The calorie counter has helped me reach 53kgs...its simple, just know what you eat and if you dont.... listen to your body, it knows what it needs. A chocolate truffle pastry is not that bad just 350 cals...girls try keeping it below 1200 in a day. Biryani is a no no...oil is a no no....however a few bites satisfy the craving and is not so bad. Pizza's anyone?...no girls dont go beyond a piece. If you do...have only veggies for dinner. Fall in love with veggies and fish...not difficult you know.

The most important rule - Don't give up anything, just reduce the quantity and if you have partied hard at night...next day abstain! Remember your stomach is stretchable...the quantity it needs depends how much you fill in it.

My aim is 50 and I will get there...Toast anyone?

Most importantly dont do it if you really dont want to....its a mind game...aspire to have the perfect weight or the perfect size...you will get there....like I am sure I will :)

a dream and a prayer

A fleeting glimpse of a dream
Souls entwine
Memories of being alive
And moments divine


*pic credit: flickr.com, Bob

Hari Sadu

Leadership and the lack of it has been a large part of my tryst with the corporate world.

Being a relatively cool person who believes anyone can do what they want and who wants to be left alone to do my thing, work has taught me the benefits of how to practice this value of my life and along with it act as a catalyst in provoking thought in people about themselves and their values. A very enriching experience I must say.

Unfortunately my work life has not been so kind to me and has constantly put me in situations where my so called leaders have no idea how to manage this little girl, who doesn't need managing at all.

My experience in leading teams made me believe that you must make people dream or just make them remember their dreams. Touch that cord in them and lift them from one level of existence to the next. No dear readers this doesnt happen by giving responsibility and increasing scope of work, this only happens if they are confident enough to take responsibility.

Confidence is intricately meshed with performance. Make a person feel like he or she is shit and the best performers will crumble and vice versa. Skills, tools, processes etc etc will all happen on the job, but are we able to actually touch what makes 70% of the difference in performance? All the conceptualization, brainstorming, sales planning etc etc will not achieve anything if your employees are not in it with passion.

Do this with your direct reportees and ensure they do it with theirs and there you have a fantastic world class team if all of you dream big enough. Simple isnt it?

Not one to take anything in life too seriously in the long run atleast, I am surprised by my own reactions to my great leaders. Why am I in situations in which I am constantly hounded to not be myself? To the benefit of all my so called leaders, I plead guilty of not keeping quiet when I see something which I don't agree with going on in work, with me or with the team that I am associated with. I also plead guilty of expecting my leaders to be far ahead of me in leadership skills and expect them to make the team dream big and be confident and passionate.

Am I expecting too much? Will someone tell me where am I going wrong? Should I really have an attitude of acceptance?

Lets just say I am not in the mood.

KISS - Keep it Simple and Stupid

( Post renamed from Its easy to be hard, but its hard to be easy)

This morning a colleague of mine, who is a usability expert in our company, showed me a calender which the usability training guys of HFI had given to all our Interface Designers after the training program over the weekend. A brilliant concept within HFI, in which they have internal contests and ask employees to come up with one-liners related to design which they brand as buttons and use avidly in trainings. This is where I got this line from.

The clue of a great website design is that you need to KISS..Keep It Simple and Stupid. Having spent much time on design and owing it to the great expert company I keep now-a-days, I have observed that this concept contributes greatly to why you like one website over the other. The Flickr pink for example, a beautiful way to highlight but pink for heaven's sake on a website, who could've have thought they could carry the concept off so well. But of course if you mess up with the search and features kiss or no kiss gets you no where!! (applaud please spoken like a true product person)

What do you like a messy webpage or a well prioritized easy to use webpage with messages like Oops bad bad server, no donuts for you?

Now what this statement basically stirred in me was nothing to do with webpages. Isn't it hard to be easy in life? Simple living!

Priorities, aims, wishes, desires...I agree keep changing, but if we can easily separate the chaff from the wheat, take it all one at a time and are able to live with a simple thought process, at times make fools of ourselves...I tell you life will be beautiful.

Lately I have been hounded by some complex delhi friends and have been a victimized as well as bored listener to conversations about why I should buy a big car, designer clothes, redo my transitional home and all that stuff people do to make their lives even more complicated. Trust me I love doing it up but not because you earned some money. I would easily spend big money on holidaying or buying expensive stuff I want but not because someone has it.

I have also often been lectured on relationships. Be hard, not easy...this has been proven umpteen number of times by collective experiences of most of my girl friends, in fact the results are instantaneous to see. A lot of fun this, but in retrospect the conversations between friends of planning and discussing results were more entertaining then the relationships themselves. The human mind I tell you sticks to what you cant have. But I have often observed that I have ended up poorer in the end of an experience like that. People who are attracted to what they can't have usually are no fun to be with and trust me they roam around in disguises. The fun of games is not what i refer to here, but the learning attached to the fun was simple to see.

Well may be just maybe the Usability concepts work in relationships too...you need to KISS...people you need to keep it simple and stupid!

Girls...some simple and stupid rules to follow. Guys some tips ;-)

1) Avoid guys who fall for all the games you plan with your friends. Though its a brilliant way to check initially.
2) Avoid guys who make you feel bad about how you look or want you to wear better and more complicated clothing, ofcourse unless you want to.
3) Avoid guys who don't KISS ( you know what I mean, I think I should rename the post, which i just did)
4) If its getting too tough to be with this guy...leave! Life usually is simple...the worst of circumstances can be dealt with simply and sensitively. If its getting tough one of you is making it complex. Your time will be better spent on playing tennis or those guitar classes you always wanted to do.
5) Avoid guys on whose priority list you appear anything but first...doesnt mean hound the poor fellas into shopping... some activities are just more enjoyable with the girls.
6) Understand making a fool of yourself, usually means spreading laughter...a great karma...so avoid guys who take it seriously.
7) Mostly for women in delhi as hoards available here - avoid guys who are avoidable...life will just get too complicated and not worth it..you could have learnt to play sultans of the swing by now!

Maybe the secret of Life is to Keep it simple and stupid.

Love...Does it exist?

A tricky topic...written at the risk of my reputation, yet close to my stubborn heart.

I watched a movie long ago called "Before Sunrise" and recently its sequel "Before Sunset". Ethan Hawke and a french woman meet in Italy on a train and spend an evening and a night together and part before sunrise, promising to meet in 6 months. They never did...11 years later they meet by chance in Paris and spend a day together. Two frustrated individuals totally in tune with each other...the french woman had a boyfriend and Ethan had a wife. They never really forgot each other and were in love.

Is this fantasy, an illusion or a reality?

Where does it start? The first glance, the first conversation or the first touch? Is it any of the firsts at all? Being a bit of a dreamer I choose to believe it is. The realization could be later or may never happen...however the rest is only the rest and comes afterwards.

Coming back to real life...do we as individuals know ourselves well enough to realize a good thing when we see it? Are we conditioned by our experiences or our ambiance to ignore it and look for something more conventional, because love my dear friends I don't believe knows any. It is a risky affair...are we scared and so settle for lukewarm security which we are sure will turn cold. Do we dare to dream?

Love, I believe, starts and ends at you yourself. Are you tuned in with yourself..if not you can forget picking up the frequency of another individual. Do we realize at this moment who we are, what we feel...what we believe in and most importantly where is it all coming from....our past experiences, our observations our conditioning or our insecurities? Can we then on realization drop it and know this may not be who we are? Does your lover or husband or boyfriend help you in this process? Do you help him?

Hundreds of people we interact with...do we have the sensitivity of noticing ourselves independently and not in relation to anyone else? Do we have a relationship with ourselves? If we do there is a strong chance that we will be bold enough to meet and know love and the fun and growth in love.

I have observed the time spent with each other is wonderful to begin with...but then it need not be just to begin with, but it often is. What spoils it? Do we realize that often we ourselves kill it. When one is going forward the other takes two steps behind...If we are changing constantly how can one take the other for granted? Isn't it usually because we are ignorant of the fact that we are changing and the other is also. Do we have the insight to see this?

Love is no guarantee for a successful relationship. But then thats a different topic altogether and will be covered in a different post.

As for the existence of it...we all know the answer in our hearts...we are just too scared to question what we have or have chosen to believe we know. A big clue my humble understanding can give is forget the movies, the good and the bad stories around you...forget what everyone around you says...look inside and follow your dreams...walk on the edge of the cliff if that is what it takes...falling off will be painful...but does that really matter?